Mistakes Men Make in Relationships

Without wishing to suggest that everyone's the same, there are some basic facts that undermine many relationships.

If you're aware of the pitfalls it's easier to avoid them, so here's a list of some of the things that commonly go wrong.

Not investing enough time in your relationship

You need to nurture your relationship - it doesn't just thrive as well on its own - it requires effort on the part of both partners.

"Housework" is not just for women

Household chores need to be shared. You can learn how to do laundry, vacuum the house and wash the dishes if you haven’t learned in the past. Equally, ladies, you can learn how to put out the trash or paint a garden fence. Better still, share the jobs between you. The variety of jobs help reduce some of the monotony and if you share doing bigger jobs, like painting the house, it can also help form a bond between you.

Your partner is NOT your Mom

You're a grown adult and your partner is not responsible for organising your life, or doing jobs you could do yourself, like making sandwiches for your lunchbox before you go to work.

Thinking everything is about you and for you

You have to be sympathetic about your partners needs. If it's "me, me, me" all the time, then that selfishness can really harm your relationship.

If tempers do flare up, work on a resolution, don't walk away

If your temper does explode, you need to give your partner time to understand why you are frustrated, and you need to spend time together working out what the solution is.

Empathise with your partners ideas

Not listening to and supporting your partner’s ideas, even if you don’t believe in them, is a real problem. People have to feel listened to to feel valued in a relationship. If you don't take time to listen to your partner's point of view, hopes, fears and dreams, then you are building up an invisible barrier.

Putting down family members

Remember that blood is thicker than water. Of course you can voice an opinion occasionally, it just means don’t constantly complain about her family even if you are right. This breeds hostility within the relationship. You knew her family before starting a long-term relationship with her, so complaining after the fact will do nothing but cause problems in your relationship.

Not learning to be emotionally available

It's very important to talk about who you are, where you came from, what's happened in the past and to describe your future dreams. Many men find this difficult, so if you feel you can't take the plunge and reveal your feelings, perhaps check out a self-help book or group. Remember, the world is not going to end if you reveal a little about yourself to your partner.